“Love all, trust a few, do wrong to none.”
―William Shakespeare
I'm going to be honest here. I struggle with the relationship quotient of living here in Delhi. It's nothing personal to attach to DELHI per se ... but living this lifestyle of an expat in general, I think.
The responsibility to love all, provide jobs for our staff, make sure that my children's well being is considered of utmost importance, continue to foster my marriage, do right by myself, keep up with homework and do our part to - in some small way - help those less fortunate than us is great. It is in your face and I am consistently asked for more.
This quote above struck me ... it kind of made me mad. After all, what Shakespeare is saying seems so easy and so natural, right?
Love All.
I am a very giving and loving person, by nature. I seek out those who need a friend, help those who need a hand up and constantly look for ways to better experiences, situations and environments. I do this so much, that it has become a fault.
I arrived here in Delhi with one clear cut mission. Do NOT volunteer too quickly. Do NOT make friends too quickly. Do NOT raise your hand, speak up or sign on the dotted line for a l.o.n.g. time.
I have never had a problem with loving all, Sir William. THAT, I have in the bag.
Trust a few.
NOT something that I can relate to. Those of you who know me well, know that I tend to trust quickly and easily. I open up easily and trust comes far too simply for me. However, if you should cross me ... after my trust has been given, then ... hell hath no fury.
It is definitely an issue for me to follow the advice and recommendations of so many to "trust a few." I am told nearly every day "well, you shouldn't have trusted them" or "you need to hold your trust close to your heart."
Why is that the case? Why can't we all just get along, cohabitate and share space without there being a constant battle for the upper hand?
Is trusting a few simply a way to preserve your own soul ... to protect your sanity and your fragile self from being harmed? Or is trusting something greater ... a willingness to be vulnerable and live a life without fear of being hurt? Is there balance to be had with trust?
Do wrong to no one.
So here's where my conundrum lies. If I'm to love all, but only trust a few ... how is it humanly possible then to do wrong to no one? In a land where it is expected that you have house help (i.e. staff that us Americans all think would be SOO cool to have) ... when you are constantly in a situation of being asked for help, and in a land where the common response to needing a situation resolved is "tomorrow, ma'am" ... how is it possible to do all three?
There is - for me - a huge dichotomy of one's character when you are trying to protect your family and yourself in a chaotic situation where you don't really know up from down (read :: standing your ground, not letting people cut in front of you in a land where "queues" are literally non existent, being firm and forceful with staff so things are done according to your wishes, wanting to scream at the top of your lungs to get your request accomplished [such as having your laptop repaired that happens to be under warranty]) ... but where you are also a woman of character and consider yourself kind and fair.
Before I arrived in Delhi, I assumed that I would continue my normal way of living ... just in a hotter climate and with someone doing my laundry for me. Little did I know that this relocation would start to chip away at who I thought I was.
Do discuss with me ... and share your thoughts?
