Today I'm writing over at Chef's Widow ... to help fill in the space in her corner of the world while Jonathan and Amelia get started on their book.
Showing posts with label borrowing. Show all posts
Showing posts with label borrowing. Show all posts
Guest Post : Cleveland
Give the girl a choice ...
I've been slammed recently for my whine post (back a couple of months ago) whereby I lamented about having to choose the menu for every day of the week, lest we get stuck with chicken.
I must add a post-script note that the beef (no pun intended) I have against chicken, is that often what you get here is barely chewable ... and not the quality of poultry that I would choose to feed my children.
Enter Jenny. She does all of the work at planning a week's worth of menus and we're going to follow her menu plan faithfully this summer (based on items we can get readily available here, that is).
Not only is Jenny a brilliant photographer and web designer (stay tuned ... she'll be soon redesigning Delhi Bound!), but she's the kind of mother I would like to spend time with. She's a cool cat AND from Nebraska ... can't beat that!
Recently, we took a cue from her recent menu plan and had Shanti make all of the fixins' for loaded baked potatoes. The beauty of something like this for dinner (yep - it was all we had for dinner!) was that everyone got to CHOOSE.
Mia was happy with her potatoes, cheese and cream of asparagus soup on top. Tony was beyond tickled with his salsa and bacon bits galore. Terran kept his simple as well, and I went hog wild and put EVERYTHING on mine!!
My point is ... I think our family will be better off with menu options that gives us the right to choose. Through the summer we're going to work on that ...
I see Muffin Tin Lunches in our future!!
Moving overseas
I read a lot of blogs. I don't comment on many of them, but I read a LOT. The other day I read one that I had to share ...
Written by Fanni and posted at Expatify
I agree with so much of what Fanni says ... but also feel that an expat experience is different for EACH family/couple/situation.
My mother's expat experience in Kenya is - in some ways - much like my experience here in India. In other ways though, it is vastly different. The Husb's experience as a previous expat in various countries is vastly different in most ways than his current situation is now that a wife and kiddos are in tow.
The best advice I can offer anyone who is considering a move abroad is to read, research and ask questions. Ask some more questions, read some more and add in more research.
When you're tired of that and can't do anymore ... to copy the advice Ellen was given, go into a situation with no expectations, then at least you won't be disappointed.
If you make the decision to become an expat, and are then disappointed with the outcome, current situation or frustrated with the struggles, then I offer this quote (of which I plan to print and hang on my bathroom mirror!) ::
“Life may not be the party we hoped for, but while we’re here we should dance.” ― Author Unknown
Written by Fanni and posted at Expatify
Moving overseas can be a very bad idea for some people and here’s why:
1. You may stay longer than you planned.
The longer you stay the more life at home will go on without you. You will miss the small and big family events. Your friends will develop routines that don’t include you. Making time for your phone calls will become more of an effort for them.
2. It is more difficult to raise children without family and friends nearby.
You may not realise how much you rely on siblings, aunts, uncles and grandparents nearby to help with raising children, but everything from babysitting, to moral support is difficult to come by when you’re parenting 6,000 miles away. Skype just doesn’t fill that gap.
3. Cultural isolation.
You will not have a shared history with anyone, except your partner if you have one and then only if he or she is from your home country. You won’t understand the in-jokes at dinner parties, you won’t know the good places to go for buying wardrobe basics, or the best grocery stores for the widest selection or the places to avoid at holidays or that shops close for half a day in the middle of the week.
4. You may have to retrain in order for anyone to take your credentials seriously.
Education systems are becoming more similar across the world but many countries still do not often recognise the qualifications gained in another country. The reasons for this are varied: laws may differ, such as business operating laws and if you work in HR you simply need to learn the new laws. Legal requirements differ such as with medicine where you need to retake exams to show you are competent to the host country’s expected level. Or, the decision to not accept your credentials could be a form of prejudice or ignorance. Can you afford to retrain–can you afford the money or the time?
5. Your identity is challenged.
If you are not moving for your career, but for your partner’s, then you become the trailing spouse—that is your identity, not lawyer, or teacher, or whatever you were at home. If you are travelling for work you become the American or the Australian, or the Brit and you automatically take on all the baggage that label carries with it—the loud American, the sexist Aussie, the Brit who drinks too much. Everyone stereotypes. It will be up to you to show them you’re different but until then, you’ll just be a stereotype.
6. Culture Shock.
It’s hideous. And it is not just for new expats—even after living somewhere five or 10 years you will still experience culture shock. Everyone gets culture shock. You will not be an exception no matter how open minded you think you are, no matter how much you think you want to live in another country.
7. Homesickness.
This will hit when you’ve just returned from a visit home, or when you’ve had a bad night sleep with a new baby or when you’re sick of the weather, or when you see a family get together and you know your family are getting together without you. Or it will hit when your washing machine breaks down and you have no idea how to navigate the little nuances of repairman culture in the host country. How could that be difficult, you ask? (Here all the seasoned expats have a knowing chuckle…)
8. Saying goodbye.
These aren’t just ‘see you next week’ goodbyes. These are ‘see you in a year—hopefully,’ goodbyes. You may go several years before you see some people. Can you imagine that? Or, when you return to your home country, you will say goodbye to the many good friends you have made in your host country. You will never see some of them again.
9. Hearing things about your own country and people that you may not like.
Like the stereotypes above, people in your host culture will have opinions about your home country. Some will be big, loud opinions voiced at inappropriate times, such as a dinner party. Everyone will be watching you for a reaction. Do you a) smile and take it on the chin, b) agree wholeheartedly even if they’re wrong, c) get angry and shout back, or d) offer an equally offensive opinion to see how they like it?
10. You are convinced your home country is the best in the world.
You are setting yourself up for disappointment because either a) you will discover that there are indeed other very fantastic countries in the world, or b) you will hate living in a lesser country.
11. You may not want to go home.
‘This is a good thing!’ you cry out. Yes, and no. If you can’t extend your visa then it’s a bad thing. If you have family back home that will be heartbroken, then it’s a bad thing. If you have friends and family back home that you love and love to be with but you have made a life in your host country then you will be forever torn, and that’s a bad thing.
If you really, truly think you can cope with these 11 factors, then perhaps an expat life could work for you.
I agree with so much of what Fanni says ... but also feel that an expat experience is different for EACH family/couple/situation.
My mother's expat experience in Kenya is - in some ways - much like my experience here in India. In other ways though, it is vastly different. The Husb's experience as a previous expat in various countries is vastly different in most ways than his current situation is now that a wife and kiddos are in tow.
The best advice I can offer anyone who is considering a move abroad is to read, research and ask questions. Ask some more questions, read some more and add in more research.
When you're tired of that and can't do anymore ... to copy the advice Ellen was given, go into a situation with no expectations, then at least you won't be disappointed.
If you make the decision to become an expat, and are then disappointed with the outcome, current situation or frustrated with the struggles, then I offer this quote (of which I plan to print and hang on my bathroom mirror!) ::
“Life may not be the party we hoped for, but while we’re here we should dance.” ― Author Unknown
Farewell to India.
... borrowing from Lora ... a vivacious redheaded spunky expat I had the pleasure to meet during the early months of our time in Delhi.
... her words mimic those that I can imagine writing myself. They touched me when I read them a couple of months ago, as they packed up to move ... she's given me permission to share it with you ... enjoy.
India. We leave India tonight, and it marks the end of a great adventure for us.
What a grand adventure it has been! With much excitement to move to our new home and begin a new discovery, it is with pulled heart strings that we leave what has been our home for two years. Hard to believe it has been two years; once said, it amazes us that it has actually been that long. It feels rather short in time as all of the days seemed to have sped by seamlessly.
In the time that we have spent here, we have seen so many sights that, spoken of otherwise, we would have found difficult to believe. The people that we have met have been some of the most colourful people we are sure we will meet in our lifetimes. The experiences we have had will never leave our memory, nor will some ever relinquish their scars; this past two years we will cherish for all our days.
India’s ability to dig deep into one’s depths of emotion is uncanny.
The majestic feelings one gets standing on the threshold of the Taj Mahal soaking up the story of great love, death and deep sadness that is embedded in its marble structure is unforgettable.
Fighting to manoeuvre through the streets of Old Delhi, in hunt for that one essential oil that is guaranteed to calm your nerves in the day to day chaos of life in Delhi, is to experience a battle of survival that is exhilarating yet most frustrating.
Listening to the small children at the car’s windows beg for money with such small voices of pitiable charm and persuasion can bring up confusing emotions of irritation and sympathy.
Choking on the soot-filled air of winter, watching the burning of the plastic and garbage that creates such pollution, one wonders with anger how a nation can be so ignorant of the damage they inflict on their environment.
Struggling to walk through the misshapen aisles of a market, hoping to avoid the slimy running sewage of animal innards as it seeps along a trough at your feet, covering your nose with the flimsy tissue you found in your purse so as to block the gagging smell of slaughter going on all around you, it is disbelief and fear that overtakes you as you try ever so quickly to find your needs to purchase and evacuate the area.
Observing the beauty of the ceremonies that play out every single day and night as men, women and children offer up their praise and worship to their gods in displays of light, fire, and music and chanting, makes one introspective and wonder of their own spirituality and its place in life.
While guilt sneaks into the back of your mind, you cannot help but wonder if one’s own culture and upbringing is seen as welcoming and honouring as the welcome and honour an Indian will favour a stranger when entering their home.
Road rage like never experienced on any other road or in any other situation before, overtakes your senses when trying to manage a short trip of 2 kilometres that ends up taking thirty minutes; disbelief at the utter chaos on the roads and complete lack of attention to road rules and courtesy can make you a true vigilante.
And then there is the caste system that continues to exist, exasperate and confuse us with its existence.
Ah. All the things that make India, India. Most certainly a country to experience, come what may.
So, in only hours now, we will get in to our hired taxi and make the bumpy trip to the airport and then check in for our flight. Within 4 days time, we will have left this side of the world, landed on the other side, found a new apartment in New York City, shopped for some items for the new place, received our shipment of personal belongings sent from Delhi, and no doubt will have had to shovel a bit of snow. Such big changes in such short order!
With our hearts full, we want to say a very warm thank you to all of our friends here in India that we have been so blessed to have met and made. Wherever our paths take us in life, it is our hope that they cross once more and we can reacquaint ourselves again.
We bid you all adieu and wish you all the very best that life has to offer. A saying apropos to this would be ‘lang may yer lum reek’.
We shall miss you all.
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